


The Hippogriff's Cage

by fadinglight (flammablelight)



Series: Al's HP One Shots [7]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Voldemort, But I've Got a Replacement!, Drag Queens, Fluff and Crack, French Black Family, I'm Not Ashamed, Indian Harry Potter, Multi, Sadly No Agador Spartacus, The Birdcage - Inspired
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-21
Updated: 2021-03-21
Packaged: 2021-03-26 02:35:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30099006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flammablelight/pseuds/fadinglight
Summary: AU - Sirius and Remus own a gay bar in Diagon Alley, their adoptive son Harry is planning on bringing home his boyfriend for the first time. Hijinks ensue.
Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter, Lucius Malfoy/Narcissa Black Malfoy, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Series: Al's HP One Shots [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2108796
Kudos: 3





	The Hippogriff's Cage

**Author's Note:**

> All characters belong to JK Rowling.  
> Inspired by the 'The Birdcage' - Based on 'La Cage aux Folles' by Jean Poiret - not _perfectly_ the same plot, but influenced very heavily.
> 
> Assumes no Voldemort (ever) and Harry was raised by Sirius and Remus.

Remus Lupin fills two glasses with Firewhiskey and sets them on the wicker table on the balcony looking over Diagon Alley. He smiles at the crowd milling about outside the club he owns with his husband. 'The Hippogriff's Cage' was purchased when their son Harry was fourteen and Sirius' mother died. They had been delighted to move from a crappy two bedroom apartment in Croydon to this four bedroom converted loft above their thriving drag bar.

"Siri is going to be mad at you," Gigi sing-songs behind him.

"Leave it, Gigi," Remus snaps, hearing the other man leave.

Sirius' opening croon to "Fever" flows up over the noise from the street, Remus resets the Noise Dampener on the balcony and settles himself in to wait. Soon, a firm hand squeezes his shoulder and a kiss is pressed against his temple. Remus places his hand over the other man's and grins up at the tanned face of his son, Harry Lupin-Black.

"Hello, Dad," Harry's smile is warm and open, he drapes into the chair beside Remus and gratefully takes the offered glass of liquor.

"Rough week, cub?" Remus smirks into his whiskey, knowing Harry both adores and is irritated by his childhood nickname.

"I'm twenty-two, don't you think I'm a bit old for cub?" Harry gripes, predictably.

"Never too old, my love. You could be sixty and Minister for Magic and we'll still call you cub," Remus checks his son over. Harry's smile and eyes are bright but he has some shadows under his eyes and he's looking a little pale despite his half-Tamil heritage.

"Don't give me that look," Harry grumbles.

"What look?" Remus raises his eyebrows and tries to smooth his expression.

"The worried parent look," Harry rolls his eyes.

"I'll have Gigi make you some dinner before you turn in," Remus smoothes his hand over Harry's unruly black curls.

"Okay Dad," Harry huffs impatiently but he's trying not to smile.

"Your letter didn't say why you're staying with us," Remus raises an eyebrow.

"Er, well someone set my place on fire," Harry grins sheepishly.

"Salazar's saggy bollocks, cub! You weren't hurt at all?" Remus checks Harry again.

"I'm fine, Dad. Kingsley put some great guys on the case, plus Dora," Harry assures him, "I just need somewhere to sleep and shower between shifts for a while."

"Go on in, I'll be in there in a moment," Remus drains the last of his Firewhiskey and stands up to light a cigarette.

"Dad," Harry is giving him a stern look.

"Don't use your Auror voice on me," Remus smiles, "Marijuana is not illegal in wizarding London. The moon was last week, it helps."

Harry scoffs again but opens the french doors and steps inside, calling out to Gigi as he does.

.·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .

Sirius discards his heels into the basket next to the door where the apartment is connected to the club downstairs. He steps out onto the balcony and eyes the two glasses empty on the wicker table before gripping Remus' wrist and yanking his husband to face him.

"Who did you have up here, while I'm down there, singing for our supper," Sirius hisses.

Remus rolls his eyes, "Come and see."

Sirius stomps after Remus, furious at first but growing curious when his husband flicks a Silencing Spell over their feet.

"Here's my secret rendezvous," Remus holds the door open to show Sirius a soundly asleep Harry, curled around the giant stuffed dog that has been on his bed since he was two.

"Oh," Sirius whisks into the room, casting a Temperature Regulation Charm and ensuring Harry is tucked well enough in the blankets.

"Still jealous?" Remus is lounging against the doorway, smirking at Sirius.

"Shh, you'll wake my chiot précieux," Sirius whispers furiously. He presses half a dozen kisses over Harry's temple, taking care to not disturb his son.

Remus shuts the door and presses his husband against the wall beside it, "How could you think I would ever look at anyone but you?" He murmurs the words over Sirius' lips, the tip of his tongue skimming Sirius' full bottom lip.

Sirius melts into Remus' embrace, "I'm so old and tired looking, how could I keep your interest?" He pouts moodily, drawing Remus to roll his eyes.

"Perhaps I can think of some way for you to keep me interested," Remus keeps his voice low and hoists Sirius up by a firm grip on his buttocks, smirking when the shorter man wraps his legs around Remus' waist.

.·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .

Gigi set a large bowl of fruit salad beside Harry's already stacked plate of bacon, eggs, sausages and waffles.

"Gigi, I can't possibly eat all of this," Harry complains half-heartedly, already shoving a strawberry in his mouth.

"Tu vas manger, petit amour, tu as besoin de ta force," Gigi runs his fingers through Harry's hair and twirls back to the kitchen.

"I'm a grown man, I don't need to get stronger to do my job," Harry calls out after the leggy brunette.

"Don't you talk like that in my house," Sirius chides Harry as he slips into the chair beside him, "Gigi just wants to be sure you're cared for."

"Exactement, you are our precious bébé," Gigi places the steaming teapot onto the table in front of Harry and hands Sirius the milk jug.

"Gigi, can you dress a little more modestly?" Remus frowns at his brother-in-law from the doorway.

"You've been asking me for fifteen years, papa loup, nothing has changed," Gigi smiles coquettishly.

"I can see your arse cheeks," Remus raises his eyebrow.

"Impoli! Non, you cannot," Gigi turns to show Sirius the length of his shiny satin shorts.

"Stop stirring, Remus," Sirius sips his tea and gestures for Remus to sit down.

"Nice to know you're all still arguing without me here to fuss over," Harry grins at his parents and uncle.

The bickering continued, Gigi crying out in offence to Remus suggesting his off-key singing was not enough to allow him to perform in their revue. 

Harry cleared his throat and put aside his fork, drawing the attention of the three other men. "I have to tell you something," Harry looks at Sirius, "I'm engaged."

The room exploded into noise, Gigi exclaiming excitedly about a new set of dress robes for the occasion, Sirius dissolving into hysterical tears and Remus trying to ask Harry pertinent questions without raising his voice to the other two men.

"Harry, you're so young," Remus had managed to quiet Gigi with a Silencing Charm and Sirius with a cuddle.

"I know, but I love him. I can't wait for you to meet him, he's such an incredible person," Harry bites his lip to contain his grin, "He's a Healer, just finished his training. He patched me up a few times last year and we started dating."

"Only a year of dating?" Remus raises his eyebrows.

"Oh, well... I mean I knew him in school..." Harry tries to get up and clear the table.

Sirius removes his head from Remus' shoulder, "Cub, who is your fiancé?" 

"Er, well, Draco. Draco Malfoy," Harry flinches in advance of the explosive reaction he's sure Gigi and Sirius are going to have. He's not wrong.

.·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .

"Was it really _that_ bad?" Draco was trying not to laugh.

"Oh, babe, it was worse," Harry put his face into his hands.

"I'm sure they'll relax once they meet and get to know me," Draco tried to reassure his partner, "I'm charming. They won't be able to resist."

"Godric, I hope so," Harry sighed heavily, "When do you come to visit?"

"Mother and Father are arriving from Milan later this afternoon, I'll tell them and make arrangements for dinner," Draco smiled.

Harry jerked his head out of the fire and back in, "I've got to go, Gigi is screaming at Dad about singing tonight. I love you."

"I love you more," Draco replied and shut down the Floo.

"You love whom, darling?" Narcissa breezed into the room, pressing a kiss to Draco's cheek and handing her silk wrap to the waiting elf.

"Mother, when did you return?" Draco stood up and brushed his clothing.

"Father had some kind of tête-à-tête with Nott Senior," his mother sounded bored, "Some new committee they're looking to set up."

"When he gets home, can we please sit down for tea? I need to talk to you both," Draco tried to keep his voice even.

"Is everything alright, petite étoile?" Narcissa took her son's hand.

"It's brilliant, Mother," Draco clasped his hand over hers, "I just want to share the news with you both."

.·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .

"This is exceedingly good news," Lucius crowed, "It ties in perfectly with my Family Protection Committee."

"Father, I don't want my engagement to be a political tool," Draco's voice was stern.

"No, no, of course not. Fortuitous timing," Lucius was trying to placate his son.

"Lucius, dearest, perhaps we should arrange a time to meet with Draco's fiancé and his family?" Narcissa interjected smoothly.

"Absolutely. Draco, arrange a formal dinner, I think it would be appropriate to have it at the family's home. The Manor can be a bit intimidating for first meetings, we want them to be comfortable joining our family," Lucius waved his hand for Milly to serve him more tea.

"Alright, Father," Draco hurried off to Floo Harry.

.·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .

Harry arrived late to dinner that night, having been part of a large-scale raid on a senior member of the Ministry cabinet. Forty-seven Aurors and sixteen Unspeakables orchestrating a mass operation on one of the oldest wizarding families in Britain.

"Cub, you look positively ghastly," Remus pressed a kiss to Harry's temple and shoved a cup of brandy spiked tea into his hands.

"Fuck me, I'm cold," Harry shivered, sipping the hot tea, "I was part of a raid on their Gringotts vault, some kind of weird temperature charm in there - for really awful reasons."

"Spare us the details," Sirius shuddered before he called out to Gigi that Harry was home and to bring some food.

"Bonjour, chérie, long night?" Gigi appeared with a plate of steaming pain au chocolat.

"Oh, I love you Gigi," Harry moaned as he shoved half of a croissant into his mouth, "Fuck, hot."

Sirius chuckled and offered him a glass of cold water to soothe his burning tongue.

"Hey, so I spoke to Draco before the raid and his parents want to have dinner with us," Harry looked up nervously.

"No worries at all, cub, we support you," Remus nodded.

.·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .

"Lucius," Narcissa's voice was urgent, "Lucius, wake up!"

"Ugh, Cissa, it's barely six. What is so important?" Lucius groped about for his wand.

"The Prophet, Lucius. It's awful," Narcissa thrust a newspaper that was thicker than usual under his nose.

Lucius Summoned his reading glasses and blinked at the cover page: 'Nott Implicated in Sex-Trafficking and Muggle-Hunting: Auror Raids Executed Overnight!'

"Ci-Cissa," Lucius gasped, "Water!" 

Narcissa Conjured and handed her husband a tall crystal goblet filled with cool water. Lucius swallowed it noisily and wiped his face clean of sweat.

"What will I do?" Lucius panicked, "We're supposed to have a presentation on the Family Protection Committee tomorrow."

"You will distance yourself from that man," Narcissa chided, "Find another family to champion the cause with. You will make a public statement deriding Nott's actions."

"Right, yes, of course," Lucius gasped.

"Father, Mother?" Draco's voice sounded from the hall outside their bedroom.

"Come in, mon fils," Narcissa called out.

"Are you alright, Father?" Draco looked concerned, "This is all rather... untoward."

"I'm fine," Lucius rasped, "Shocked and disgusted mostly."

"Did you read the details?" Draco wrinkled his nose, "They found eighteen Muggles dead in a cold storage trunk in the Gringotts vault. Harry called to check in this morning, now that he could talk to me about it and he said it was revolting."

"Harry, dear?" Narcissa queried.

"Harry Lupin-Black?" Draco rolled his eyes, "My fiancé?"

"I don't believe you'd gotten around to telling us his name, Draco," Narcissa said archly, "I did not realise he was a member of our extended family."

Draco wrinkled his nose again, "Not really, Mother. He was adopted by your cousin."

"Sirius? Or Regulus?" Narcissa raised an eyebrow.

"Sirius is his adoptive father, along with his husband, Remus Lupin," Draco responded.

"The werewolf? The one who runs the gay bar?" Lucius spat out.

"The successful, popular husband of the equally successful, talented Pureblood darling of Diagon Alley," Narcissa corrected, "Publicly supporting Draco's match with Harry right now would help your campaign."

"Of course," Lucius looked pleased now, "The son was born Harry Potter, Halfblood son of James Potter of the Oxford Potter's and Lily Evans, that Muggleborn witch who revolutionised several Healing Charms and the amendments to the Wolfsbane Potion."

"Dreadful business when they died," Narcissa sniffed.

"Was it was some kind of Muggle contraption that killed them?" Lucius queried.

"Train crash, Father. Hardly entirely Muggle, we used a train to get to school, remember?" Draco reminded him.

"Yes, but it has all sorts of protective charms," Lucius pointed out, "There were others killed?"

"Two others, a few injured," Draco rattled off, "But perhaps we can avoid the topic around Harry?"

"Of course," Lucius flapped his hand about, "I'd like to make a statement today about Nott. Contact Pansy, Narcissa?"

"Yes, dearest," Narcissa stood up, "Draco, escort me to the breakfast room?"

.·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .

"Sorry about the statement," Draco kept his voice low, even with a Privacy Charm he didn't want his Father to overhear.

"No, I get it, it's your dad's career," Harry shook his head.

"I miss you, between night shift and my parents being home," Draco sighed.

"It'll be fine once my apartment gets fixed up," Harry shrugged.

"Did they ever work out who set it on fire?" Draco questioned.

"Yeah, my mate from work, Ron? His little sister. Apparently she had some kind of weird crush on me, but when Ron told her I was gay she went a little nuts," Harry shrugged again.

"Oh, I did see Ginevra come in to the ward a few weeks ago, but she was whisked off to Mental Maladies so I didn't know why," Draco bit his lip.

"I was fine, I wasn't even home," Harry grinned, "I just lost a few clothes and things. Dad and Siri were thrilled that I moved back in with them for a while."

"Well, at least there is that. I'll see you tomorrow night?" Draco smiled through the fire.

"Yeah, babe, see you tomorrow night. Love you," Harry grinned.

"I love you more," Draco shut the Floo.

.·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .

"Come now, Narcissa. Where is my travelling cloak?" Lucius whirled around, looking for Milly.

"It's hanging in your closet, dear," Narcissa stepped out of her dressing room, immaculate in silken, sage-coloured robes.

"Ah, right," Lucius slung the cloak over his shoulders.

"Dearest, are you nervous?" Narcissa smoothed the cloak over her husband's broad back.

"Well, I'm going to ask Black to support my Family Protection Committee," Lucius stood tall, "I need to make a formidable, yet personable impression."

"You will dear," Narcissa strode from the room, accepting her own cloak from Milly and using her wand to drape it around her slim frame.

"Are you ready?" Draco burst into the hall from his own suite, "We need to leave now or we'll be late."

"We are ready, Draco," Narcissa smiled benignly, "Get your cloak."

The family stepped through the Floo, arriving in the Lupin-Black foyer at exactly seven on the dot.

Lucius is greeted by Remus, stepping forward to shake the man's hand and handing off his cloak to one of his wife's cousins. He looks down to realise the man isn't wearing shoes - nor is he wearing a shirt under his formal robes!

"Lucius Malfoy, you are?" Lucius' voice is imperious.

"Bonjour, homme attrayant! Cissa, your husband is incroyablement chaud!" Gigi exclaims, "Je m'appelle Gigi."

Lucius looks blankly at the man, "Regulus?"

Gigi flaps his hand, "Call me Gigi, Lucius." He kisses Narcissa on the cheek in greeting before taking her cloak too.

"Your husband and son will join us, I expect?" Lucius turns back to Remus.

"Sirius had to perform downstairs, he should be finishing up and joining us any moment now," Remus checked his watch.

"Sorry, I know I'm late," Harry bursts through the Floo, still in his Auror robes and with his lip bleeding heavily.

Draco tuts and grabs his fiancé by the jaw, healing the cut and tidying his appearance with a few well chosen spells.

"Sorry, babe. I had to arrest Blaise again and his John got a little aggressive," Harry gave Draco a crooked smile and leaned in to press a kiss to his cheek.

"Let's spare my parents the details of what a John is, shall we?" Draco replied sotto voce.

"Hi, Harry Lupin-Black," Harry extends his hand to Draco's father.

"A pleasure to meet you," Lucius clasps his hand firmly, "Thank you for your service to our country."

"Oh," Harry flushes, "I'm just an Auror."

"You are the first and last line of defence for our community," Narcissa chimes in, "You deserve the respect. Narcissa, lovely to meet you Harry."

Harry kisses Narcissa's hand before stepping back to place his arm around Draco, "Thank you. Dad, where's Siri?"

"Just finishing up, I'm sure," Remus smiles tightly, "Shall we adjourn to the dining room? Sirius will join us soon."

"Gigi," Harry whispers harshly as Remus holds the door for Lucius and Narcissa, "Where are you shoes? Why aren't you wearing a shirt under that robe?"

"Harry, la mignonne, I don't like shoes, you know this," Gigi wafts into the room breezily.

"I am so sorry," Harry presses his forehead to Draco's, "My family is nuts."

"Mine is too, they just act a little more decorously to make you think they're not crazy," Draco presses a chaste kiss to Harry's lips.

It is at that moment that Sirius bursts into the apartment and interrupts them.

.·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .

"Harry, petit loup?" Sirius stares at the two men.

"Siri, this is Draco," Harry leads his fiancé to his other father.

Sirius is silent for several moments as he inspects Draco thoroughly, "Il est magnifique!"

Draco flushes at Sirius' assessment, "It's lovely to meet you."

"Non, the pleasure is mine," Sirius takes Draco's hands in his own, "Harry, where is Remus?"

"Oh, they are all in the dining room," Harry starts, "But-"

"Excellent, let us join the party," Sirius drags Draco into the room before Harry can finish his sentence.

Harry enters just in time to catch Lucius and Narcissa's faces when Sirius leads their only son into the room.

Lucius stands immediately, "Well, hello. You are a lovely creature, pray, what is your name?"

Narcissa meets Harry's eyes and covers her mouth with her hand, delicately coughing which Harry is sure is covering an undignified snort of laughter.

"Tu ne me reconnais pas, Lucius, it is Sirius," Sirius grins widely.

Harry sees the moment where Sirius' words sink in. He understands Lucius' confusion; Sirius has beautiful bone structure and when he's all made up and in a wig, it's very hard to believe he's not a gorgeous woman.

"I- I- Cissa?" Lucius just about faints into his wife's arms.

"Sirius, you look beautiful, who does your look?" Narcissa comments.

"I do, Muggle make up is wildly superior in some ways," Sirius replies, "I'll get you some of my foundation."

.·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .

Dinner passes awkwardly but in a friendly matter. Harry and Draco are both relieved that while no one is truly comfortable, no one is unkind either. Lucius compliments their elf, before Gigi exclaims that he does all the cooking for the family.

Harry knew it was all too good to be true. Ron's terrier Patronus interrupts a pleasant dessert of Gigi's crème brûlée, _"Harry, mate, I hope your bloke and his family are still over. Nott Junior had not been implicated in his dad's shit, but he's blaming Lucius Malfoy for the arrest. He can't get into the apartment but I'm pretty sure he's got guys in your dad's club. We can't arrest them right now, because they're not technically doing anything."_

Harry's Auror training kicks into high gear, "Right, Gigi, get the Malfoy's cloaks. Everyone into the foyer."

Harry tries and fails to activate the Floo, Sirius and Remus both try as well. The flames stay orange no matter what he tries.

"He's cut the Floo Network to the house," Draco blinks furiously, "He was always good at Charms."

"Anti-Apparition wards too," Harry replies when he is unable to Apparate from the room.

"They know we can't stay in here forever, they also know the only way out is through the club," Lucius sighs heavily, "They'll just set fire to the building and smoke us out."

"We'll never get out unseen," Narcissa frowns.

"No, they'll have anti-Glamour wards too," Harry confirms.

"Gentlemen, dearest cousin, do not stress yourselves," Sirius' eyes gleam wildly, "For those allegedly clever wizards downstairs will never expect proud, heteronormative Lucius Malfoy to be dressed as a woman."

"But, Glamours," Draco replies.

"Who said anything about Glamours?" Remus grinned.

.·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .

"Hello, darlings," Sirius retook the stage, joined by Remus. Sirius' stunning sequinned dress in a daring shade of red complements Remus' silk robes, edged in crimson.

"We have a great performance to end the evening - presenting (all the way from Paris) Luscious Lucy and the Dolls!" Sirius and Remus join the crowd and applaud heavily.

A tall, stunningly dressed red-head with tumbling waves steps out in thigh high diamante covered boots and sings "I'm Every Woman" in husky tones.

The crowd screams and applauds as Lucy is joined by a gorgeous pair of blonde sisters and an exotic looking Indian woman who spin and dance to the music.

The quartet are joined on stage by Sirius, Remus, Gigi and their other regular performers, who add their voices to the song.

A line of dancers, headed by Lucy, step down from the stage and weave through the crowd, heading out into Diagon Alley, performing for the crowds waiting to enter the club. Remus flicks his wrist subtly, bringing down the wards protecting their apartment. He sees several dangerous looking men enter the previously hidden doorway backstage and winks at Ron Weasley, whom is leaning on the door of the cauldron shop next door.

.·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .

### Nott Junior and Associates Arrested for Breaking and Entering Popular Diagon Fixture's Apartment!

_Rita Skeeter - 16th June, 2002_

Popular Wizengamot legislator, Theodor Nott, was arrested last night with six underlings. Auror Ronald Weasley states that the men broke through privacy charms and protective wards on the Lupin-Black apartment, above popular Diagon Alley club 'The Hippogriff's Cage'.

Auror Weasley commented, "It is quite obvious that they were there to cause harm to the occupants, after Nott put out a 1000 Galleon bounty on Lucius Malfoy's head."

Thankfully Harry Lupin-Black's family, Remus and Sirius Lupin-Black, Regulus Black and Harry himself were out to dinner with the Malfoy family at a Muggle restaurant, celebrating the engagement of the two sons.

Lucius Malfoy provided a statement via Pansy Parkinson, Public Relations consultant: "The Malfoy family thanks the tireless efforts of the Auror department. It is fortuitous that the Malfoy family were dining at 'Le Serpent Couché' in London with the Lupin-Black family at the time. They would like to take this time to announce the very happy engagement of Draconis Lucius Abraxas Malfoy to Harry James Lupin-Black."

Conflicting reports came in from witnesses at 'The Hippogriff's Cage', stating that Sirius and Remus Lupin-Black and Regulus Black (known as Gigi) were present that night. This reporter suspects that the fabulously intoxicating cocktail menu offered at 'The Hippogriff's Cage' is likely responsible for the confusion.

**Author's Note:**

> This was 1000% written for the chance to put Lucius Malfoy in drag and call him "Luscious Lucy". 
> 
> I didn't translate the French for you because I think it can clunk up the story. Also it's not great French either :D. Just dump it in Google Translate if you want. Mostly they say loving things to Harry about looking after him, Gigi flirts with Lucius and Narcissa is sweet to Draco. 
> 
> Sirius' drag appearance would be similar to Blair St. Clair - stunning.
> 
> Cute inspo side note: Regulus ended up as Gigi because Harry couldn't say Regulus, so Remus tried Reggie and Harry ended up calling him Gigi. Gigi is an icon and loves being the little "housewife" for the family.


End file.
